Today marks my 103rd day without gambling.
I’d like to take a moment to reflect on why I fell into gambling addiction in the first place.
I first tried playing pachinko when I was around 20. I only spent about a thousand yen, and honestly, I didn’t find it fun at all.
Years later, around 24, while working full-time, I became hooked on adult websites. My credit card bills started to exceed 100,000 yen every month. Struggling financially, I happened to watch the anime Kaiji, and for some reason, I decided to give pachinko another try.
That was the beginning of a long, painful cycle.
For nearly ten years, I lived day by day, relying on gambling to cover my debts, while also sinking deeper into adult content addiction. My brain’s reward system — driven by dopamine — was completely distorted.
Now, over a hundred days free from gambling, I’m finally starting to see how damaged that reward circuit was. Each day reminds me that I’m moving forward, even if slowly.
When the time feels right, I’ll write more about this part of my story.
Thank you for reading, as always. 🙏
コメント